You Judge: An Inescapable Reality

You are judged. In fact, we are all judged. Simply from the way we look or the way we carry ourselves. Even worse, you judge too. We all do. Consciously, or not, we all make assumptions from the little information we gather from one's appearance.

When we see someone new, we automatically use the little information we gathered from their appearance by unconsciously checking self-made boxes while our subliminal mind takes that information to fill in the blank to create a clearer understanding of the person. We do this by putting them into impersonal categories, for example, “If we look at a chair, we can categorize it quickly enough to know there are many different chairs out there.” said David Amadio, an assistant professor of psychology at New York University.

We developed this ability to analyze a person from their appearance long ago. It was relatively safer to stay away from somebody who looked to have negative intent, as supposed to somebody who seemed the opposite. Though, later on, we assumed people who weren't necessarily in our “group” had that negative intent in some way or the other. This has carried on today to where we make unjust actions and assumptions from that person's appearance that comes along with various effects.

A person can have many reasons to do this (or even not at all) but the main one is Insecurity. Have you ever caught yourself putting somebody down just because you aren't happy with who you are? Though it doesn't usually build us back up when we do this, we want to feel good by making others feel bad.

Often, when we are scared or intimidated by others, our mind goes to many places and we resort to putting them down as well. For example, two women might feel another woman is more attractive so they make fun of her outfit. We also may fear those who are different from us, and may judge them just because they are unlike us. As you can probably tell, all of these reasons are negative. So how is this harmful?

1. Hurts other people. No one ever feels good about something someone says about how they look. So why would you cause someone to feel like that too? Which brings us to

2.Makes you feel worse about yourself. The majority of people that judge others feel really bad afterward. It ultimately makes you feel super guilty. You may think you're a bad person for casting these harsh judgments on others. You bring yourself down when you bring down others. And lastly, you

3. Perpetuate Stereotypes. The more judgments that are put out there, the more stereotypes get formed and people try to live up to (or avoid) the ideas of what they are supposed to be. Whether it's race, gender, sexuality or just their appearance they force people (including you) to feel as if you need to live up to.

Though you can't completely stop the things that form in your mind, there are healthy ways to control it. When you see that new person, try and monitor your thoughts. Is it helpful, or hurtful? Try to push them in a positive direction! Always, always avoid stereotypes. They are never good and like I said, they create a lot of negativity, so don't contribute to that. Lastly, stop judging yourself . Putting these harmful things upon others is just as bad as doing upon yourself. Think of the positive aspects of your life and focus on your own. Don't worry about what other people are doing, wearing etc. Just remember how it felt the last time you judged someone else.

Overall, the act of judging or being judged at all isn't 100% avoidable but working towards a healthier mindset is the difference between what is helpful, and what is not. This can make those effects less harmful to yourself, and everyone in between.